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Haha. Oh honey. What age is old? to qualify as an old person?? How old will you be when you stop wanting sex?

The idea that old people don't talk about, joke about, or want sex is ridiculous. We are sexual beings from birth to death, just in varying amounts through our lives. Sure, some folks stop at some point (for example when a spouse dies or they just lose their desire). But it is not a universal truth that you stop having sex when you hit X age.

It's just not a thing.

And look what you have to look forward to!


Published Date : 6/12/2019

Haha. Oh honey. What age is old? to qualify as an old person?? How old will you be when you stop wanting sex?

The idea that old people don't talk about, joke about, or want sex is ridiculous. We are sexual beings from birth to death, just in varying amounts through our lives. Sure, some folks stop at some point (for example when a spouse dies or they just lose their desire). But it is not a universal truth that you stop having sex when you hit X age.

It's just not a thing.

And look what you have to look forward to!


Published Date : 6/12/2019

YES! People over the age of 60 years old definitely ?French Kiss. Though, FYI, people from France just call it Kiss?.

There are plenty of other affectionate and/or sexual things people over 60 do as well. Maybe more so than when they were in their 20's. Just saying.


Published Date : 11/12/2019

YES! People over the age of 60 years old definitely ?French Kiss. Though, FYI, people from France just call it Kiss?.

There are plenty of other affectionate and/or sexual things people over 60 do as well. Maybe more so than when they were in their 20's. Just saying.


Published Date : 11/12/2019

Do women find a man sexy when he takes what he wants in life?

Let's break this question down. This question has so many layers yet sounds scripty. By scripty, I mean a generic enough trope to sound good but really be rather empty.

On the surface, American culture tries to say yeah, guys who take what they want are sexy. BUT

Taking what they want literally has connotations of taking something without paying for it. If I'm a man and I want a new motorcycle, then I should just take it? That wouldn't go over with authorities very well. And No, I don't find a thief particularly sexy.
Taking what they want also runs into issues of doing something without #consent or asking if it's okay to take what they want. If I'm a man and I want a woman, then I should just take her? HELL NO!! (This is potentially a much bigger discussion of women, their bodies, and access to their bodies being literal objects to be taken? when a man wishes). Yuk. Not sexy.
Oh yeah, I can hear folks now saying, Ew, I hate it when someone asks. It ruins the Mood. I'd argue that when someone asks with just the right amount of sultry/longing/desire/passion in their voice, the moment won't be spoiled.

Circling back to the subtext of the taking what they want phrase, what I think the phrase is trying to say is confidence equals sexy? and YES that's definitely a thing (see paragraph above for an example). But this phrase as a possible illustration of it is bullshit.


Published Date : 5/30/2019

Do women find a man sexy when he takes what he wants in life?

Let's break this question down. This question has so many layers yet sounds scripty. By scripty, I mean a generic enough trope to sound good but really be rather empty.

On the surface, American culture tries to say yeah, guys who take what they want are sexy. BUT

Taking what they want literally has connotations of taking something without paying for it. If I'm a man and I want a new motorcycle, then I should just take it? That wouldn't go over with authorities very well. And No, I don't find a thief particularly sexy.
Taking what they want also runs into issues of doing something without #consent or asking if it's okay to take what they want. If I'm a man and I want a woman, then I should just take her? HELL NO!! (This is potentially a much bigger discussion of women, their bodies, and access to their bodies being literal objects to be taken? when a man wishes). Yuk. Not sexy.
Oh yeah, I can hear folks now saying, Ew, I hate it when someone asks. It ruins the Mood. I'd argue that when someone asks with just the right amount of sultry/longing/desire/passion in their voice, the moment won't be spoiled.

Circling back to the subtext of the taking what they want phrase, what I think the phrase is trying to say is confidence equals sexy? and YES that's definitely a thing (see paragraph above for an example). But this phrase as a possible illustration of it is bullshit.


Published Date : 5/30/2019

Some women do, and clearly, some women don't.

When I say clearly, I'm admittedly being a little judgmental. I see gorgeous women dressed very stylishly walking around with men who are wearing the same thing; backwards baseball hats, a faded T-shirt, basketball shorts, and sometimes slides/flip flops. Is this just in California or do men all across the country do this! I get it that the outfit is probably comfortable but I mean I'm sure these same guys wouldn't dream of dating a woman who puts as much effort in as he does. Or am I wrong?

Anyway, all that to say I look at a man's style as part of the picture. Combine that with casual confidence (NOT hard core cocky) and we're getting closer. I'd consider dating a guy who dressed like described above but he'd have to not just meet, but exceed, all other categories. And if he were the most patient, generous lover who thought of his partners pleasure before his own. He can wear whatever he damn well pleases!


Published Date : 10/9/2018

Some women do, and clearly, some women don't.

When I say clearly, I'm admittedly being a little judgmental. I see gorgeous women dressed very stylishly walking around with men who are wearing the same thing; backwards baseball hats, a faded T-shirt, basketball shorts, and sometimes slides/flip flops. Is this just in California or do men all across the country do this! I get it that the outfit is probably comfortable but I mean I'm sure these same guys wouldn't dream of dating a woman who puts as much effort in as he does. Or am I wrong?

Anyway, all that to say I look at a man's style as part of the picture. Combine that with casual confidence (NOT hard core cocky) and we're getting closer. I'd consider dating a guy who dressed like described above but he'd have to not just meet, but exceed, all other categories. And if he were the most patient, generous lover who thought of his partners pleasure before his own. He can wear whatever he damn well pleases!


Published Date : 10/9/2018

It's hard to explain this when the idea of someone else completing? you is so romanticized.

(Thanks a lot, Jerry Maguire. )

When I was younger I did think I needed a life partner/husband to be satisfied. Such was the life of a young woman growing up in the 80's and 90's. A man or boyfriend defined you. Without one, Who do you think you are?

Now that I'm older and have gone through a divorce, I do feel complete without a life partner. BUT, that said, I AM thoroughly enjoying the partner I have. We complement each other. I do not feel like I am missing anything in myself. This person is a partner but not my other half.

Does that make sense?


Published Date : 11/26/2018

It's hard to explain this when the idea of someone else completing? you is so romanticized.

(Thanks a lot, Jerry Maguire. )

When I was younger I did think I needed a life partner/husband to be satisfied. Such was the life of a young woman growing up in the 80's and 90's. A man or boyfriend defined you. Without one, Who do you think you are?

Now that I'm older and have gone through a divorce, I do feel complete without a life partner. BUT, that said, I AM thoroughly enjoying the partner I have. We complement each other. I do not feel like I am missing anything in myself. This person is a partner but not my other half.

Does that make sense?


Published Date : 11/26/2018

Thank you for the A2A

No, I don't have trouble gaining feelings for the people I've dated.

I'm not sure I understand what's happening behind this question - do you have a hard time gaining feelings for people you've dated? In my mind, liking someone has to do with respecting them. If you don't respect them then how can you really like them?

Here's another question for you: do you like yourself? I mean, really like yourself?

That can be tough to answer for some folks


Published Date : 7/2/2019

Thank you for the A2A

No, I don't have trouble gaining feelings for the people I've dated.

I'm not sure I understand what's happening behind this question - do you have a hard time gaining feelings for people you've dated? In my mind, liking someone has to do with respecting them. If you don't respect them then how can you really like them?

Here's another question for you: do you like yourself? I mean, really like yourself?

That can be tough to answer for some folks


Published Date : 7/2/2019

If I had to identify a Rule for first dates specifically for people who are looking for a relationship, I'd say use the time to figure out if you like the person and could stand hanging out with them. You could even think of it as a job interview (for the job of ?partner?). Relationships aren't only about sex and those skills can be learned.

If you're just looking to hook up then the rule I'd use would be can they tell me (bonus points if they can show me) test results from their last STI test. I'd thwy can't then they aren't worth playing with. There'll be plenty of guys who, if they want to have sex with me, will jump through the hoops I need. Otherwise, no go. They can find someone else to have sex with who might have lower standards. That's my rule.


Published Date : 10/21/2018

If I had to identify a Rule for first dates specifically for people who are looking for a relationship, I'd say use the time to figure out if you like the person and could stand hanging out with them. You could even think of it as a job interview (for the job of ?partner?). Relationships aren't only about sex and those skills can be learned.

If you're just looking to hook up then the rule I'd use would be can they tell me (bonus points if they can show me) test results from their last STI test. I'd thwy can't then they aren't worth playing with. There'll be plenty of guys who, if they want to have sex with me, will jump through the hoops I need. Otherwise, no go. They can find someone else to have sex with who might have lower standards. That's my rule.


Published Date : 10/21/2018

Hate to say it, but sometimes adding a mate takes away from happiness and adds drama, stress, aggravation, or annoyance.

If you're already very happy, keep doing what you're doing.


Published Date : 1/29/2020

Hate to say it, but sometimes adding a mate takes away from happiness and adds drama, stress, aggravation, or annoyance.

If you're already very happy, keep doing what you're doing.


Published Date : 1/29/2020

I do not personally know any woman in a relationship who got pregnant from an affair with someone else.


Published Date : 7/23/2018

I do not personally know any woman in a relationship who got pregnant from an affair with someone else.


Published Date : 7/23/2018

Yes. He's my partner, I love him very much, I am very comfortable in my body with him, and he LOVES my body (probably more than I do given the body shame I carry from growing up female in the USA).


Published Date : 1/17/2019

Yes. He's my partner, I love him very much, I am very comfortable in my body with him, and he LOVES my body (probably more than I do given the body shame I carry from growing up female in the USA).


Published Date : 1/17/2019

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